Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Story Box

In case you've never had the chance - and her blog is password-protected, so you might not have...
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This little story box is handcrafted by a gal in Texas who's got a whole pantsload of creativity. She calls this one "Bud and Annette, in her yellow coat". The other day she posted this picture on her blog - which will remain linkless as it's password-protected - and asked for submissions for a "back story" for the story box.
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I putzed around and didn't do anything for a long while (and hence missed the deadline) but I finally did come up with an idea that I kinda liked. And since what the hell good is having a blog unless you can use it like a vanity press to inflict your writing on others, I've decided to post it here.
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Not sure if that makes me vain or just another writer like all the others, trying to build my monument not from a pyramid of skulls like Timur, but from my own words. Anyway, here's "Bud and Annette, in her yellow coat":
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She found the postcard in the bottom of the box; it was near the bottom, last but one of the pottage of paper inside. Pastel colors on one side, the other scrawled with his familiar backtilted handwriting, the slashing slant of “l” and “h” as familiar to her as the color of the walls around her. She could almost see his hand moving across the cardboard. Strong, blunt fingers, big knuckles. Even after he’d retired, long after he’d moved up from the shop floor, he had a mechanic’s hands.
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She moved slightly, seeing not the empty room and the mess of papers spread out but the hard white light of a desert afternoon outside the dim hotel room. The bulk of him against the white doorway writing to his sister in the gloom; her yellow coat folded neatly over the plain wooden chair, spectator pumps primly together on the floor beside him at the table. Just another late afternoon on the road with him, the motels and meals in diners and reading in back seat in the shade of a cottonwood grove outside the plants while he was inside selling hose clamps and thermostats and voltage regulators.
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For a moment her body didn’t feel the aches and indignities of eighty years. For a moment her legs remembered the good long muscular stretch after that hard day’s ride, her scalp the feeling of sun-hot silk over clean hair, the rough caress of the back of his hand across her neck that could still then – ten years after that first USO dance – make her belly tighten and her shoulders loosen. Just for a moment, sitting dry-eyed in silence, in her sensible grandma dress, she could feel the way he made her feel when he looked at her slantendicular with those hard mechanic’s hands on the steering wheel in the hot, bright afternoon.
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And in that moment she missed him so hard that it crushed her chest, binding on her heart like a hose clamp binding a cracked radiator hose.
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“Mom?” came Jeanelle’s voice from the front of the house. “We can’t wait any longer if we don’t want to be late for the service!”
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Fifty years since they had last surprised each other, for good or ill. Fifty years leaving in the morning with a hard kiss and a cheerful admonition not to run off with the mailman. Only the last surprise of waking without him beside her, of the empty spaces around her, of the hard, hot pain within her.
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“Coming…” she answered. She stood up and placed the paper back in the shoebox carefully.
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“Goodbye, Bud” she said, and turned out the light.

3 comments:

wzgirl said...

Dude. That was awesome. Great story...you def met the challenge.

Slantendicular.

walternatives said...

I'm so tickled that you were inspired, Chief. You did Bud and Annette, in her yellow coat, proud.

Your story literally gave me chill bumps. In your words, I can visualize Bud's mechanic's hands, see the way he looked at her at that USO dance....

Thanks for your story and for posting it on your blog.

atomic mama said...

Wow, that was cool.

Except I always though Annette was transsexual.